Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
