Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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