i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
