I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
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