How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
