I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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