How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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