Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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