I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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