But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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