Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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