I can tuck mytits in my pants
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
He keeps bees of course he's weird
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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