I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
