I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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