He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
