i don't like sucking hair
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
