she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
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