I bet he comes in French.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Randomize
