my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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