Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
