He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Randomize
