Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
