You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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