4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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