Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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