Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
we have pet lesbian snakes
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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