When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
