he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Randomize
