after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
