this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
How's work?
Spinning.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Randomize