Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Randomize
