ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
