help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
ttyl tear gas
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
