Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
