I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
