My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
