last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
