he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
how drunk are you?
Several
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
