the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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