is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
