is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Randomize
