Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
