I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
