Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Randomize
