You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
