I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
