either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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