I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
