you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Randomize
