I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Jerry, you need to find god
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
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